there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Randomize