mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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