I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Randomize
