I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Randomize
