there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
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