DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
