On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
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