I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Randomize
