Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
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