Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
