It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
