Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
ttyl tear gas
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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