So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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