I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
