So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Randomize
