I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
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