Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
Randomize