i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
did you just send me my own nude
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize
