there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
