Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I wish i was in the wii world.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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