I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
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