Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
