I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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