So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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