It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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