I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
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