Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
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