he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
