I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
