I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Randomize
