I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
tell me about the eggs
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
