I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
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