i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
