FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
