i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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