can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
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