The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Randomize
