Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
His hands were made for my vagina.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
