...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Randomize