Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize