We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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