You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Some dudes just stopped and stared at me peeing in the street for like 5mins, and I yelled HEY. HEY. WANT ME TO SHIT IN YOUR MOUTH? I'LL SHIT ON YOUR CHEST FOR FIVE DOLLARS, PAPI
this is why i love drunk you
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
