He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Randomize
