for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
