Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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