Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
