Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Randomize
