Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
