So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize