But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize
